Thursday, March 30, 2006

Why are men so self centered?

Why is it when you bring up a topic and attempt to generalize it, most men will take a topic and make it ALL about them?
You could be talking about the latest PMS treatment and a man will turn the topic around and it will suddenly become about him.
This morning I was discussing with A MAN who shall remain nameless about a concern I have over UPS delivering packages to people who are associated with the package, but are not on the address label.
I believe when you fill out the forms for delivery, there is space provided where additional instructions can be placed.  If instructions do not include - "Drop this package off to anyone who claims to know me" the package should be delivered to the specified address and NONE other!  Period!
This MAN that I had this discussion with HEARD me say - "I don't want UPS EVER dropping off a package addressed to me with you because I don't want you knowing my business."
WHERE the hell did that come from?
No wonder the biggest reason for breakdowns in any male/female relationship is communication.  I don't care if it's husband/wife, boyfriend/girlfriends, father/daughter, boss/employee - male and females should not be allowed to communicate on any serious topic EVER - at least without Dr. Phil being on hand.
If you were expecting a package that had YOUR name on it and it was just dropped off with someone who happened to know you, would you be concerned?
Help me out here!
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Susie Collins said...

Great question and pretty common communication issue--the "disagreement" seems to come out of the blue and smack you up the side of your head--kind of like being hit by surprize with a Mack truck!

What this can be is an opportunity to find out more about what the other person is thinking and not saying. If you can keep yourself from getting defensive (usually not an easy job and I speak for myself), ask a question deeper like "I heard some fear in your voice, can you tell me more about it?"

With something like that question, you open communication rather than shutting it down with defensiveness.

Susie Collins, Relationship Coach,