Eliza's Intro

Howdy ya'll, I know I'm late on my intro and I'm very sorry about that, but I did a lot of reading in the meantime and have lots to talk about. First off, no I'm not a divorcee or have stepchildren, but before ya'll start running away I grew up with the whole blended family bit.

My parents divorced by the time I hit 8-years-old and I lived with my mom for a while. My dad ended up with custody of us (good thing) and got married to my mom (stepmom) by the time I was 10. (can't recall exactly) My step-mom (I call mom) already had a daughter, who was 11 months younger than myself, my dad had two children (myself and brother) as well. Before I reached 13 my biological mother would have two more children, both girls.

I learned all about what it meant to go from a family, to custody batttles, to a new family and all the ins and outs that go with that. Today, my sister (stepsister) and I are very close. For myself, I've been married for 11 years and have four children. As you can see I do have a little to contribute and can't wait to contribute.

How about you? Are you from a blended family, past or present?

Competitive Feelings Toward StepChildren

Reader Submitted Discussion Topic:

Does anyone else feel competitive toward her step-daughters?

This question was left in the comment section and is obviously being expressed by a very frustrated mother.

If you have a comment you'd like to share but would rather not post in the comment section, please feel free to send it via email to share. Your email address will not be saved, distributed or sold - in fact, after I copy what's in the email, I'll delete it, period.

I can't say that I've felt competition within our own family dynamics but I certainly feel some frustrations with the outside influences.

I'm so bent on being fair to all our children and when extended family members don't respect that "boundary" it makes me feel like I have to pick up the slack from their deficiencies. So competitive feelings come into play in that area once in a while.

special note to commenter courtney -- I clicked your link but it didn't reveal anything. I would like to get in touch with you privately to discuss further options for your seeking readers, advice and support. If you would send me an email at the link above, I'd love to email with you.

Blended Family Open Thread

I'd like to invite others who are searching the net for information on Blended Families to leave a comment here indicating exactly what the problem is, what answers they hope to find and if there are any resources out there they've found beneficial that I could actually mention here on Step by Step.

I can't promise I'll have the answers, but your help would give me a good guide to go by when coming up with content here on Step by Step.

Suffer the children?

The article referenced below shows a clear indication that Americans live to work while other countries work to live. I believe if more families were being raised by one parent being able to stay at home (or work from home) we'd see these statistics skew quite a bit in the more positive direction.

On Wednesday February 14th Unicef published a report comparing the well-being of young people in 21 rich countries, and concluded that British and American youths endure the worst quality of life of any.

In fact, as the authors of the UN report admit, such broad conclusions need to be kept in some perspective. Many of the data presented are hardly new or surprising: who did not already know that rates of teenage pregnancy are high in Britain, or that junk-food-guzzling kids are getting dangerously fat in America? Accurate comparisons of social and educational trends, between countries, are also notoriously tricky to make. Perhaps most important, the report could cast more light (though it does give some) on how child welfare is changing over time. Rates of infant mortality, child deaths caused by accidents or other scores of health and safety, for example, show that children in all these rich countries in fact enjoy an historically unparalleled quality of life.

Where Britain and America really score badly, however, is in the categories of relationships and risky behaviour. British and American children apparently spend less time (and eat fewer meals) with their parents, compared with the other countries, and seem to be somewhat less happy with their friends and in school.

Complete article found at The Economist

I'm especially interested in just what people are thinking? Why would you choose to bring children into a world to be raised by hired help? Certainly I understand there are many parents who don't have the choice but to work outside the home, but those who are 'career' driven and make the conscious decision to have children and rush back to work - WHY?