How Did I Get Here?

People are too much work. I'm lonely. I miss having people drop by for dinner. I miss being able to vent about kids and not having everyone look all pained because of their sense of how horribly I stressed my kids. I do feel like the biggest "meanie" on the planet, and I can't figure out how I got here. I was coping. I was loving my kids. I fell in love. We're doing the best we can. Do you ever get absolution?

How many of you wake up one day wondering just how you got to this particular place in your life?

I've been there a few times myself. I used to travel a lot. I used to go to social events all over the U.S. I used to date famous people for crying out loud.

Now my day consists of work, laundry and an occasional phone call. But much like our commenter has pointed out, you wake up one day and feel like you've grown to a place of isolation and the people who once surrounded you, now run from you because you're the one with problems.

Advice, anyone?

Even if you don't have advice, perhaps you can join in to just share and lean.

Making Painful Decisions

One reader has written in with the following:

My husband and I have been married for nearly 5 years and in that time, we've had so many people telling us what to do, we don't even know what it's like to be a family.

We started off in financial struggles because of a layoff so soon after we were married. Because of our own struggles, family members have stepped in to help, but because of that help, we are not placed in the position of being reminded all the time of the help that was given.

It doesn't matter that much of what was given has been repaid - it's still a constant reminder that we owe them.

These same family members stress the blended family boundaries and cause tension within our household. I've tried to get my husband to do something about it - because my efforts have failed.

Shy of moving to outer Mongolia and without phones and internet, what can we do to create a home that's free of outside influences that place so much stress on this marriage that I'm not sure I even want to stay in it anymore? Depression is becoming the norm in my everyday life.

Help

I don't feel that I'm in a position to provide the best advice, so I'm placing this letter on the Blended Family Blog in hopes that others with blended family experience can chime in with some support and advice.